Hidden Insights is happy to announce a completely new zodiac made up of 34 signs of the zodiac instead of 12. The new signs will be ruled by seven elements as opposed to the outdated four. As a new system, it comes with a new series of rules known as the April Fool’s Rules.
Ok, perhaps that wasn’t the most clever April Fools prank every created, but Hidden Insights couldn’t help itself. In all honesty, we will all need a good laugh to get through the week ahead with the ominous Mars conjunct Saturn coming on Tuesday.
This conjunction occurs approximately every two years, so while it’s not rare, it does bring a spike in disaster, acts of violence, and general anxiety to the world — but just for a few days. Of course each conjunction occurs in various signs, and this week it will fall in Capricorn. Both Saturn and Mars are very well placed here, so they will likely express this energy much more gently than it usually would. Certainly there is no need to stay home and hide from the world. Instead, we should be aware that impatience, agitation, and aggression will be running high this week, particularly since Mercury is still retrograde.
While we are speaking of Mercury, it will interact with both Mars and Saturn this week as well. Mercury will make a harsh square to Mars on Wednesday and then another square to Saturn on Thursday. These will be the tension-filled days this week, and our interpersonal relationships will be be tested. Arguments will be much more likely, and road rage may be completely off the charts. Again, Hidden Insights doesn’t recommend hiding from the world, but if you notice your own temper starting to flare up, try to remember that it’s likely not important and will pass by the end of the week.
The stars give us some reprieve on Friday when lovely Venus will lend a gentle trine to Saturn. This is a cooling aspect that will bring us down from the tense week. It allows us to take a few steps back and will help heal any interactions that may have gone wrong. Saturday brings no major planetary interactions, which will help us all relax, reflect, and recover.
So, there is a lot of tense energy out there this week, but I’m certain we can make it work to our advantage. Saturn and Mars aligning in Capricorn can actually be quite productive. When correctly channeled, it can act as the trigger to the start of a race. This week I would like you to think about something you’ve always wanted to accomplish or start doing. On Tuesday, write out what it is you want to work towards in a red pen. Draw the glyph for both Saturn and Mars on the same piece of paper and place it somewhere safe or sacred. Personally, I plan on putting it on the mirror in my bathroom, so that I can continue to be inspired and influenced by the energy as I work towards my goal.
Aries (21 March — 20 April)
This is the perfect week for you to refocus your professional image, Aries. Mars and Saturn are likely to shake this area of your life up, and this week’s conflict could manifest with an authority figure for you. Perhaps a boss, parent, or even law enforcement could bring some conflict to you this week. As this occurs, it may feel like you need to change how the world perceives you. Mercury’s squares on Wednesday and Thursday could turn tensions inward, as you may become your own worst enemy. Try not to be self-defeating, you can’t change overnight. The weekend promises to boost your ego, and you may even make some connections where you could earn extra cash.
Ruling snack: Pretzels
Taurus (21 April — 20 May)
You start this week off feeling a little lost in your own head, Taurus. The past seems to be popping into your mind, and there’s a sense of nostalgia as you relive happy memories. For those of you who are students, Tuesday could prove to be problematic with teachers or instructors. Individuals who are not currently in school may find Tuesday’s conflict brought on by a heated philosophical or religious debate. Do your best to remember that points of view are never black and white. As a stubborn sign, that may be difficult to do, as you’re also determined. Use that to your advantage. While your faith may be tested this week, anticipate some encouraging advice from a loved one who will help put the world into perspective.
Ruling snack: Hard candy
Gemini (21 May — 20 June)
Collective debt is the name of the game this week, Gemini. Most of your week is likely to focus on bills, budgets, and sources of income. This is never an easy topic to deal with, and this week your patience here will be tested. Someone is likely to confront you about money you owe them, or ask you to share a bill. For those of you who share financial responsibility with a partner, this could be a source of tension for the majority of the week. Your friends may also seem to be banging down your door for financial help as well. Chances are you will hear about a friend who has lost a job, can’t make their rent, or has gotten themselves into a pretty sticky mess. Wednesday and Thursday are scheduled to be the most difficult, and conversations surrounding money will cross your path. If possible, you’ll want to hold off on having these conversations until at least this weekend. Relief comes then, but only enough to keep drama with friends away while you deal with it at home.
Ruling snack: Chips and salsa
Cancer (21 June — 20 July)
You’re inspired to shine at work this week, Cancer, and you feel confident you can make a good impression if you stay optimistic. Undoubtedly true, you will be able to draw positive attention to yourself easily. At least with authority figures. This week’s Mars and Saturn conjunction occurs in your seventh house of love and partnerships. While this doesn’t often spell disaster for one’s romantic life, it certainly can cause some drama. As the rest of the world deals with this aspect on a global scale, you’ll feel it most specifically when relating to others, not just romantic partners. Fortunately, your early optimism will help you power through this energy, but you should certainly be aware that conflict with others may seem to follow you most of the week. Friday’s lovely Venus trine brings peace to this tension, when you may be invited to a live or online support group. Go ahead and give it a try, you’ll likely meet some great people in the process.
Ruling snack: Carrots
Leo (21 July — 20 August)
The week starts off with big plans and ideas, Leo. It may even feel like you want to conquer the world, or at least explore it. While you may be presented an opportunity to get away, you may want to exercise restraint and graciously decline. Mars, Saturn, and Mercury influence your work environment. Leo loves to shine, but you may want to lay low this week, as tempers among your coworkers are like to be delicate and at time extreme. Even when you feel like you are right, and you want to fight based on morality, keep your thoughts to yourself. Try to remember, that you can use all this pent up energy over the weekend as you’ll be offered the opportunity to blow off some steam with some physical activity.
Ruling snack: Yogurt
Virgo (21 August — 20 September)
Most of the world seems to be running around in a panic, Virgo, and you remain amazingly calm. This is because the tougher aspects made by planets this week sit in a way that move to you creative relaxation rather than aggression. Of course, you could be influenced by the aggressive energies, particularly if someone gets in the way of you taking time to unwind. A do not disturb sign will be your best friend this week. You may also be treated by someone to an evening out, or professional massage. Allow others to spend money on you this week, you deserve it. For those of you with children, this week’s tension will be seen mostly with them. They are more on edge than usual, but somehow you don’t seem to care. Even if they come to you convinced that the sky is falling, you’ll be able to put it into perspective.
Ruling snack: Fudge
Libra (21 September — 20 October)
Anticipate some important news from a close friend or acquaintance early this week, Libra. Chances are they are starting a new project or journey and would like your input. While it may be suggested you join in, respectfully decline, and only offer advice. Tuesday could bring some tension at home, and you may want to be extra vigilant with candles and other sources of heat or open flame. There is an increased chance of a minor accident that could do damage to your beautiful décor. It’s also likely you may have an argument with a partner on Wednesday. If you are single, chances are it will manifest on Thursday when someone comes to your home or contacts while you there. Your ruling planet’s aspect to Saturn on Friday sets the tone for a weekend filled with taking joy in getting some much needed chores completed.
Ruling snack: Avocado
Scorpio (21 October — 20 November)
Communicating with others may be a challenge this week, Scorpio, and it’s not just because Mercury is still retrograde. Your mouth may feel like it is itching to tell others off, and we all know how much you love to do this from time to time. There will be plenty of opportunities for that this week, particularly on Wednesday, when people you meet seem to lack the most basic common sense. While you feel like sharing your opinion more openly this week, you’ll want to be cautious eating and avoid chewy foods all together. An increased likelihood of biting your tongue or developing a sore in your mouth is amplified this week. Many will see relief this weekend, but your relief comes in the form of eloquence with an authority figure. So if you have to work this weekend, put on the charm and you’ll win over your boss.
Ruling snack: Smoothie
Sagittarius (21 November — 20 December)
It is said that money makes the world go around, and this week you’ll feeling it more than ever, Sagittarius. While I wouldn’t call it a spending problem, you will be more inclined to shop than usual. Everything you see seems to call to you, and you will need to work hard to balance needs and wants. Gambling may also creep up on you this week, but it’s not a lucky period for games of chance for you right now. The other way this week’s energy can be channelled will be through sexual expression and even procreation. If you’ve been trying to get pregnant, it could certainly happen this week. If you have no interest in having a child, perhaps abstinence would be the best course of action. Over the weekend, expect to feel the need to get outside. Suddenly you’ll feel less like placing value on buying things, and be inspired to experience nature. Invite a friend or two to come along, as you’ll be successful making plans with others.
Ruling snack: Ice cream
Capricorn (21 December — 20 January)
This week you continue to focus on yourself, Capricorn, and possibly spend more time at home. However, this introspective energy could quickly lead to feelings of depression. Do your best to not be too secluded. Much of the week brings people, letters, calls, and cards to your home, and frankly, you just feel like being left alone. While you may feel like lashing out to those around you, their intentions are well meant. So, when you are confronted with someone’s words that seem insincere, it may be that they only can’t find the right ones. By Friday you may be feeling a bit more like opening up, and it will be time to do something special for yourself.
Ruling snack: Caramel popcorn
Aquarius (21 January — 20 February)
Early this week you’ll notice some feelings of suspicion, Aquarius. This is because you can sense that there is a secret to uncover. Typically you like to let others live their own lives, but you feel an intense urge to investigate. At some point on Thursday you’ll realize that you don’t need to do much digging, as someone will trust you with something confidential. Know that while you’re digging around in others’ lives, a secret of yours may also be revealed this week. Your neighbours also play an important role this week, and you may find yourself conflicting with someone who leaves next to, above, or below you. Unfortunately, there’s not much you can do about it, so you’ll just have to ride out the drama. By the weekend this conflict will likely cool off, and it’s a good thing too. You wouldn’t want to be embarrassed in front a visitor to your home on Saturday.
Ruling snack: Cheddar cheese
Pisces (21 February — 20 March)
A heavy emphasis on your circle of friends rules the week ahead, Pisces. Of course, you always value important people in your life, but you’ll be more aware of their importance this week. This is because some healthy conflict will show you who your true friends are. A true friend is likely to tell you something you don’t want to hear, but it will be important for them to say it. Honour their ability to be honest with you, and respect the difficulty of communicating it. While we are on the topic of friends, there may also be an exchange of funds with a friend. This could be repaid loan, or the giving of a loan. Anticipate this happening on Friday, especially if you’re out about town with a group.
Ruling snack: Cookies
The following two tabs change content below. Eric J. Pride
is an astrologer, wizard, writer, and the founder of the Central PA Lodge of Wizardry. In his free time, Eric enjoys unraveling the power of incantations through linguistic analysis and experimentation. He currently hold's a B.A in Psychology, which has helped him dive deeper into the mysteries of occult sciences. Check out his website at yourpersonalastrologer.com.